Intimacies when a friend leaves
How much life can change in a week!Last Thursday, while she wrote about calls from lovers, she remembered Dr. Oscar Ojeda and the overflowing enthusiasm of him in the networks when he decided to tell us about his new love.
I thought then to use it as the protagonist in a chronicle about couples with a difference of age and identical desire to live.But that story I will not be able to write it.At least not for now: my great friend, my mentor, my platonic love in the professional and spiritual, my accomplice in Sunday Oasis, in the afternoon at home and naked, died last Saturday of a heart attack.
He died working, loving, conspiring for the good of humanity - in abstract and in concrete actions -.And yes, all that makes its departure less real, because its life was so intense that it leaves an irreversible echo, but it touches its cronies to keep perceiving that wave on the stones of everyday life, and the mission, although honorable, is very difficult.
As Jorge knows, I will confess here that at some point the possibility of having an idyll with Ojeda went through my mind.I don't know if it was a shared fantasy because there was never the slightest insinuation on its part.It was a gentleman, of those of brilliant armor and clean heart, so that Iianantin, that mutually enhanced energy, we focus it from the first day on human improvement: the public and that of the public that we share without reservations or professional jealousy.
Mojigata, I didn't take the initiative?Nah ... He was married and I admired the value that relationship had in his life, so it would not be ethical.
Being close to Ojeda, capturing the attention of its teaching and love, was an extreme healing experience.It was impossible.
From the first Sunday that I saw him in the Taíno radio cabin I loved his personality, and since that day he welcomed me as a disciple in this world of holistic sciences.I cannot even remember what my life was before its influence, because 70 percent of wisdom jewels in my PC and almost one hundred percent of my current paradigms, actions, competences, vital perspectives would be erased.
When Jorge entered my life, Ojeda welcomed him lovingly, he made it part of the group and gave him the courage to leave the conventions behind and help me create Senti2, this project inspired by his own experience, and that he would have grown much more and much earlierto hold on with more faith to his vision of us as an intimate and public couple.
Of all possible attitudes in the face of the certainty of death, I had a long time ago I chose to be at peace.I have said it here, in the chronicle opens my eyes.It is with the life with whom I have matters to be resolved, and it would not be worthy of the love of Ojeda if I do not hurry to face them and take advantage of them.
On Friday, one day before his death, we were less than one hundred meters from his house.But we didn't see it because we rushed, like the other five or six times that Jorge and I reached Flores, at the other end of the city with respect to our house in order.
Seven years of deep friendship and we never specify the visit to take a wine together and try mutual seasonings ... Don't you think it's absurd?And see what we made plans to see ourselves like that!
But life is what happens while we plan what to do with it, and the lesson this time was really shocking.When a friend leaves, as Cortés says, he leaves a space that nobody can fill: the space of everything we did not do together ... a void that the soul will keep as debt and not as a memory.
Have you heard that "living as if you were dying tomorrow"?Ojeda lived like this, day by day, and it is an honor to have been close to see it.As is an honor that they chose to delay the last program that we recorded all together to honor him in the afternoon at home.
That was the hug that could not steal the pandemic.And of course we cry a little when I watch it on Tuesday on TV, like the day of the hard news and even now to type or draw.But tears do not tarnish the joy of having known him.The happiness of having your love, wherever I go, now and always.
